exeggutorhead: (okay I may have messed up)
[There's just a short text from Envy's number today:]

Hypothetically, if you have to use a fire extinguisher on an oven, the oven would still work afterwards right?

[Any of Envy's housemates who came to investigate the mix of angry and then panicked shouting that happened shortly before that text went out will be able to find him sitting on the edge of the couch, with flecks of foam all over his front and in his hair, staring at the door to the kitchen like he'd like to murder it. There's a thick, acrid smoke spilling out of the doorway. It smells a little like oranges. But mostly just nasty burnt food.]

[Looking inside the kitchen will reveal batter covered dishes, a frying pan filled to the edges with a smoldering black thing which may have been a pancake, and a pot that's the source of most of the smoke. It's also clearly what the fire extinguisher was aimed at. No, that wasn't a hypothetical question at all.]

[Envy, in the midst of the frustration, is hoping that he's not going to have to buy Greed a new oven.]
exeggutorhead: (but see what about this other thing?)
So we're all from different worlds, right? Whole planets full of millions of people.

So what are the odds that people who know each other show up all the time? They've got to be astronomical, but we can almost EXPECT it to happen.

I'm from one of those worlds that isn't one with Europe and America and all that. And almost everyone who's ever shown up and heard of my country? Either I've known them or someone else here has. And every single one of them has been from the same time period of a few years. Nobody I only knew from, say, a hundred years ago ever shows up.


[Random Joe Notinvolved from Amestris should by all rights appear so why doesn't that happen? This is something he thinks about on and off, but after his conversation with Jimmy the other day, it's itching at his mind again.]

Has anyone else noticed something like this?
exeggutorhead: (Edmund the ghost librarian)
[The feed comes on to show the face of a very nervous and harried looking Yamask, holding the 'Gear and looking over his "shoulder". From somewhere offscreen, there's a whole lot of impatient-sounding hissing. Which, for any Pokemon listening in, would translate as:]

Come on, hurry it up!

[The Yamask flinches a little and turns the camera away from himself to show an Arbok and a Serperior, coiled side by side and each looking as impressively cool and collected as they can manage. And decidedly not looking at each other. The Serperior is a shiny, and that gives him an impressive glittering gleam from his tail to his smugly turned up nose. And the Arbok, while not shiny herself, still has every purple scale polished and almost gleaming, and her hood flared out as much as she can get it. The camera lingers on the two of them while they pose and sway to catch the sun on their scales just right. After a little while of this, the Arbok nods curtly and the video swings back around to the Yamask, who fumbles it some before cutting off so that he can send out a text message.]

Hello, my friends here had a question for any trainers who would like to answer. Which of them looks the best?

[And so they bullied this poor guy into doing the camera-work and writing the message for them. If anyone in Violet stumbles across the trio of Pokemon on the outskirts of town, they'll find the two big snakes hissing arguments between themselves and crowding around the Yamask so they can see the answers.]
exeggutorhead: (Edmund the ghost librarian)
[The feed comes on to show not Envy, but the face of a slightly nervous-looking Yamask instead. Edmund has a favor he needs to ask, and he needs a human trainer to help him out. Shortly, the video blanks out and is followed by a text written in english. That's the lucky thing about being the reincarnation of a librarian, is that he remembers how to write.]

Hello, my name is Edmund and I am a Yamask. I need a human to help me, by escorting me into the Goldenrod Library records section so that I can look for something. My trainer wouldn't take me. So if there is anyone who can help me with this, could you please respond?
exeggutorhead: (what're you lookin at)
[There's an anonymous message popping up on the network this afternoon. And I do mean anonymous; Envy has made as sure as he possibly can that nobody would be able to trace this question back to his Gear ID.]

What does it mean for someone to have a soul? In your world or in your religion or whatever you think. What does having one give you, or not having one keep you from doing?

how can you even tell if you have one?


[It'll be a little while before Envy actually responds to any answers, because two seconds after he hits 'send' and realizes what he's done, he chucks the 'Gear clear across his hotel room. Miraculously, it doesn't break the machine entirely, even if the screen gets cracked all to hell. He can't believe he even thought to ask something like that, much less actually went through with it. Since when did he start turning into Lust and asking ridiculous philosophical questions about the nature of existence? That's something he's always just rolled his eyes at and halfway tolerated, why does he feel the need to ask things like this now?]

[But this is a question that's bothered him for more than a year now, ever since he took that brief trip back to Amestris. Does he have a soul after all? And what the hell is he supposed to do with the thing if he does? Mostly he ignores it, leaves it alone as a doubt in the very back of his mind. But then during the last crazy weekend, Heather had been sure he had one, had brought that question back to the forefront. It's been months since then, and he still can't shake it off. And if he has to ask stupid questions to the network in his weakness, then...maybe the answers will let him push this back down into something he can manage.]
exeggutorhead: (mildly frustrated)
[It's early morning when this feed comes on, the camera focused on an Aerodactyl--which, while already the size of a large dog, still looks young--curled up on the sidewalk beside a sleeping Vaporeon. Said Aerodactyl is decidedly not asleep, and is looking intently at something off-camera. The stillness doesn't last long. His head lowers slightly, back hunching, before exploding into motion. The camera follows him as he…strangely doesn't take flight, but rushes with a hopping gait along the ground using its wings in place of forelimbs. Straight into a flock of Pidove.]

[Fortunately for the birds, they all manage to take to the sky in time to escape, leaving the Aerodactyl hopping in frustrated circles and snapping up at the air. But still he makes no move to fly after them. A few moments later, the Vaporeon that had been sleeping before walks back into sight of the camera, tail waving in irritation as she scolds the Aerodactyl. The dinosaur calms almost immediately, tucking his head down contritely before following her back towards the camera like a duckling. But the camera doesn't linger on this, instead swinging back around to show Envy, who's frowning.]


It's been more than a week since he hatched, and he still won't fly. He should be able to, he was born with the move.

[He sighs frustratedly, leaning back against the bench he's sitting on and gesturing with one hand.]

Like I'd know how to teach something how to fly. What am I supposed to do, throw him out a window and see what happens?

[…which no he's not really going to, he doesn't think it would actually work. There's a reason why he was happy to let his Vaporeon take over the baby dinosaur parenting duties, and that's because Envy does not know how to deal with baby anything, but he still doesn't want it to get terribly injured.]

Locked text to France, Tulio, and Miguel )
exeggutorhead: (calm)
[It's been a while since the network last got any broadcasts from Envy's 'Gear; just a day shy of a month since he woke back up in Johto kicking and screaming. He's spent that time getting re-used to the world, getting used to being human and to everything that comes with it all over again. It was easier to manage this time, even after being gone a year, and he's not sure if he likes thinking about that.]

[But when the 'Gear turns on, it's not pointed at Envy's face, but up at the sky and the treetops. From the lack of buildings and the forest, it looks like he's out walking just outside of Ecruteak. The camera's following the flying form of a smaller-than-average Tropius as she wheels and skims along the treetops as fast as her leafy wings can propel her and actually looking oddly graceful for such an un-aerodynamic creature. She backwings right in the sight of the camera, neck arched like a question mark, and peers down at her trainer before she's off in another direction again. But she did stop long enough for viewers to catch sight of the little blue Riolu perched on the top of her head, looking perfectly secure in her footing. Apparently this is far from the first time the two Pokemon have done this.]


I still don't know how something looking like that can even fly at all.

[And there's Envy. The camera lingers on the flying pair for a moment longer before he turns the camera to himself. He's sitting on the back of his Tyranitar while Chimera lays out and enjoys the sun, so he's looking a bit farther off the ground than usual. Envy looks a far cry from the raging, wild-eyed person who woke up a month ago; he's back to looking composed and neat and just a little smirkish. Adjusted back into Johto? Mostly. Forgotten the reason why he was so angry? Hell no.]

There's something I've been wondering about, and I figured I might as well try the network. Does anyone happen to come from a world with a place called…'London', I think it was? I don't know anything more than the name, but--

[He's interrupted by a pair of loud, startled cries from up in the air, and the video tilts and wobbles crazily as Envy jumps up and off Chimera's back and lets the arm holding it fall to his side.] Damn it, Izumi--!

Watchers might be able to catch the remnants of a bright glow coming from somewhere above the screen before they'll see that Tropius make an extremely ungraceful, skidding landing in the dirt, along with a newly evolved and newly very dusty Lucario. Turns out that suddenly carrying a much bigger passenger while in the middle of some fancy flying trick does terrible things for your balance. Envy's already walking over to the pair of them, but they're getting to their feet and look like their only injury was to their pride. The now-Lucario barely even looks like that's the case, more concerned with looking over her evolved form with a mix of wonder and smugness.]

Heh, I was wondering when you'd evolve, Samus. [Envy sounds almost proud of her, and gives the fur on her head a ruffle with his free hand. Izumi makes an indignant noise and butts her head against his side to demand attention too. Envy sighs and relents, ending the feed to free up his hand before he winds up getting knocked over by a flying bananasaur.]
exeggutorhead: (Default)
[Envy switches the video on to show himself sitting in what look like some of the higher branches of a tree, although not so high that he's in danger of his perch breaking. Someone is obviously enjoying the sun and warm weather Johto is having right now.]

[But while he looks to be in a good mood, there's also something he's been thinking about. Namely that he was informed of some events from his future by one Roy Mustang. Events that aren't going to end well for him. And while he'd prefer to think that Roy is just lying about it, it's still not something he'd like to chance. So, Johto, Envy has a question for you.]


Hey, for anyone that sees this. Say you found out about something from your future while you were here. Do you think it's possible to change it?

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September 2017

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