65th Transformation [text | action for Shark House]

[exeggutorhead]

[There's just a short text from Envy's number today:]

Hypothetically, if you have to use a fire extinguisher on an oven, the oven would still work afterwards right?

[Any of Envy's housemates who came to investigate the mix of angry and then panicked shouting that happened shortly before that text went out will be able to find him sitting on the edge of the couch, with flecks of foam all over his front and in his hair, staring at the door to the kitchen like he'd like to murder it. There's a thick, acrid smoke spilling out of the doorway. It smells a little like oranges. But mostly just nasty burnt food.]

[Looking inside the kitchen will reveal batter covered dishes, a frying pan filled to the edges with a smoldering black thing which may have been a pancake, and a pot that's the source of most of the smoke. It's also clearly what the fire extinguisher was aimed at. No, that wasn't a hypothetical question at all.]

[Envy, in the midst of the frustration, is hoping that he's not going to have to buy Greed a new oven.]

Comments

[armoredsoul]

If you set the house on fire I am flying back there to punch you in the face.

...and the fire extinguisher itself shouldn't harm the oven.

[Whatever set the fire going, on the other hand...]

[exeggutorhead]

I didn't set the house on fire!

why the hell would I be asking about ovens if the actual house was on fire

[GOD, ALPHONSE.]

and it was just hypothetical anyway

[armoredsoul]

Uh huh. Sure. And I want to take Dante out on a date to the ball.

[fatalissimo]

Nah, you're probably pretty fucked.

Hypothetically.

[Thanks, Nonon.]

[exeggutorhead]

Well, shit.

Hypothetically.

but really that's not very helpful at all

[As thought Envy has ever been helpful towards people's questions on the network once in all the years he's been here.]

[fatalissimo]

Totally helpful, actually. You did want to know if it'd be fucked or not, didn't you? It's hardly my fault that you didn't get the answer you wanted.

Action!

[a_sin_for_him]

[Lust heard noises from the kitchen long before she smelled anything burning. Even the smoky smell only garners a raised eyebrow and a glance over her shoulder at first. She's busy, with both television on for background noise and one of her Pokemon biology books open on her lap.]

[But with the culmination of the sound of some hissing thing, the scents, and the 'hypothetical' text from Envy, Lust is on her feet and flinging open the kitchen door.]

What in god's good name is going on in here?

Action

[exeggutorhead]

[Envy's waving away what smoke is still coming from the pot, and the fire extinguisher has been clunked down by his feet. There's a frustrated scowl on his face, and his nose is wrinkled from the smell.]

A recipe that didn't work, that's what.

I started putting the ingredients in and it caught on fire.

Action

[a_sin_for_him]

...isn't that a pot? Isn't that for liquid?

[How does anyone set liquid on fire?!?!]

[ossifragant]

Should I be worried about the state of my house?

[exeggutorhead]

no your house is fine

really

you won't even notice when you get back

[ossifragant]

[HE'S JUST MAKING SURE.]

Just... be careful.

[At... least this is Greed; he's too laid back to be anxious about needing to repair or replace his oven.]

[action]

[no_ufo_ending]

<sub>[Henry is just sitting in the living room. He's been here the whole time and the man has heard things. He's also sitting as close to the wall as the sofa allows and is trying to make himself look very very small because he's regretting his volunteering to eat whatever Envy managed to make.]

[Just because you can't die in Johto doesn't mean you can't be put in a state where you wished you could.]</sub>

[action]

[exeggutorhead]

[With the kitchen as not-on-fire as it's going to get, Envy flees the nasty-smelling room and sits on the arm of the couch.]

[Which is when he notices Henry huddling there, and sighs in a mix of frustration and embarrassment.]

You don't have to eat this one. It's covered in the fire extinguisher stuff.

[Even he knows that's not edible.]

[no_ufo_ending]

_{[Henry heaves a huge sigh and sinks down in his seat a little. Oh, thank Arceus.]}

Well, hey...third time's a charm, right?

[envy_the_sinners]

[Okay he'll bite.

BUT ONLY BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT LUST'S HOUSE TO BURN DOWN.]

I would not think that to be your number one concern if the oven is on fire.

[exeggutorhead]

[WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK HE'S BURNING THE HOUSE DOWN?!]

It isn't on fire anymore we have an extinguisher

[text]

[awesmazings]

[....uuuuuh.]

Envy? Is everything okay?

[text]

[exeggutorhead]

everything's fine!

cooking is just harder than I thought it would be that's all

[Text]

[crouching_sin]

[Should he... even ask...]

That depends how much damage has been done.

[Text]

[exeggutorhead]

Well most of the foam is on the stovetop, I haven't gotten too good a look at it yet. I don't think the oven itself is where all the smoke is coming from.

text, /a week later with starbucks

[pipers_son]

well even if it doesnt you can probably replace the parts toget it running again!






probably

text

[exeggutorhead]

yeah probably

but hell if I'm putting it back together myself, I'm not a mechanic. It'd be worse than if I'd just left it on fire.

[ACTION]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[So hearing someone banging around in the kitchen in this house is a LITTLE unusual, at least now that France is gone. Heather won't lie and claim that she hadn't looked up from her spot on the patio outside and cocked an ear at the sounds of attempted baking going on, but she was trying to clip Cujo's nails and that's kind of a job that requires concentration.]

[Concentration that is broken when the fire alarm goes off.]</sub>

--What the FUCK?

_{[Barking his head off, the Growlithe wriggles free from his trainer's lap and goes galloping inside, skidding into the kitchen excitedly. Heather follows closely behind, less excited and more alarmed.]}

... What the hell HAPPENED in here?!

[ACTION]

[exeggutorhead]

[Envy's got the extinguisher out when she comes in, spraying foam at the pot on the stovetop. The fire is well out by now, but that wooden spoon that was in the pot when it caught fire is going to need a replacement. Maybe also the pot. He's looking both alarmed and clearly very frustrated with the...everything. The shrill noise of the alarm isn't helping.]

It wasn't supposed to catch on FIRE!

[He gives it another spray of foam. JUST IN CASE.]