exeggutorhead | 65th Transformation [text

[There's just a short text from Envy's number today:]

Hypothetically, if you have to use a fire extinguisher on an oven, the oven would still work afterwards right?

[Any of Envy's housemates who came to investigate the mix of angry and then panicked shouting that happened shortly before that text went out will be able to find him sitting on the edge of the couch, with flecks of foam all over his front and in his hair, staring at the door to the kitchen like he'd like to murder it. There's a thick, acrid smoke spilling out of the doorway. It smells a little like oranges. But mostly just nasty burnt food.]

[Looking inside the kitchen will reveal batter covered dishes, a frying pan filled to the edges with a smoldering black thing which may have been a pancake, and a pot that's the source of most of the smoke. It's also clearly what the fire extinguisher was aimed at. No, that wasn't a hypothetical question at all.]

[Envy, in the midst of the frustration, is hoping that he's not going to have to buy Greed a new oven.]

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[He's relieved when she smiles, and his own turns a little less bitter for it.]

[It's a good thing, to have someone who understands. It's a big part of why he listens to her so much, why she's able to calm him down when very few other people would be able to.]

Hah, they probably would. Mine never did like competition.

It'd save us some trouble, I guess.

Mine either.

I guess it would be a fitting end.

_{[Not as fitting as the one Dahlia ultimately received, but Heather doesn't feel like going into that. There's little satisfaction in thinking about her death.]

[Death hadn't stopped the old hag from reaching into the future and continuing to ruin the lives of those she abused in life.]}

It would be.

[Nor as fitting as Dante's, although Envy doesn't actually know what happened there. He still doesn't really believe Al that she died and didn't just slink off to lick her wounds and gather strength and servants again. He lets out a long breath.]

I'd help you with yours, if she came here.

And I don't...really mind if you kill my mother, if she shows up. So long as you don't expect me to join in.

[He's actually grateful that she keeps offering, honestly, as messed up as it is. They're messed up people.]

...but if she did, she'd be a LOT more dangerous than she was in that dream.

_{[There's a darkness in her voice as she chuckles in response to the offer. It's far different in the waking world as opposed to the dreaming one-- more self-aware, and a little self-deprecating.]}

Thanks, but nah... if she ever comes here, I want her all to myself.

_{[But she gives Envy a smile that's equal parts murky and apologetic. The combination kind of just winds up looking tired.]}

I don't mind taking yours, too.

I guess I'm greedy like that.

_{[Messed-up indeed.]}

Anyway... I'm used to fighting dangerous things. Kinda my life's work.

_{[She pauses, then shoots him another grin that's a little brighter, with a laugh in her voice as she adds--]}

Can't exactly put that on a resume back home, but... it has its perks.

[Envy sees that darkness, and it's still a little unsettling to see on HER...but not nearly so much. He's got a much better idea of where it came from, and it's something he can understand VERY well.]

Okay then, she'll be all yours. I'm not about to take someone's revenge away.

[Her reassurance makes him feel a little better, but he's still uneasy about the idea. She probably hasn't fought anything like alchemy.]

[But...]

[She'd have a better shot than most. He's seen her fight monsters. He returns her grin with one of his own.]

I'll believe you on that. Hey...let's keep throwing junk for a little while longer.

[THEY COULD USE IT AFTER THIS CONVERSATION.]

... Yeah.

_{[THEY SURE COULD.]}

We got all night.

65th Transformation [text | action for Shark House]

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