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[exeggutorhead]

"Hey, this is Envy. I'm busy or not around, so say whatever you want here and I might get back to you about it."

Comments

[exeggutorhead]

Ha, that felt good to watch.

[He actually braves a snicker, riding that high of total lack of consequences for either of them. Although now that she's out of sight...]

[He glances at Lust's Ishbalan nerd.]

Hey, so...I don't know how you feel about yours, but...I could go find another trash can if you wanted.

[Creators are...complicated. He knows she's not as angry as he is with Hohenheim, he'd know if she was. But...that doesn't mean she's not angry at all.]

[a_sin_for_him]

Oh...

[Lust finally looks at her own ghost. he's just standing there, with that mildly pleasant expression on his face. She doesn't know what her feelings about him really are, but she doesn't want to put him in a garbage bin.]

No. No, I don't think so. He doesn't upset me. I just feel...oh, I don't know. Guilty and sad, I suppose. Is that strange?

[exeggutorhead]

[He's not going to insist she puts him in a trash bin, so he just shrugs and leaves the offer at that.]

Sad, sure...why guilty, though?

[He sounds a little confused, but willing to listen. Although it's strange...this isn't something they've ever really talked about before.]

[a_sin_for_him]

[It surprises Lust, that Envy asks that question. It's something that she's so used to thinking about, it never occurred to her that she'd never outright shared it.]

He gave me a second life for a reason. One that I...have no interest in. Even if he were still alive. I have no feelings of love for him. Which is enough alone to make me feel a sort of vague guilt, but...

I rather went out of my way, didn't I, in distributing those feelings elsewhere.

[exeggutorhead]

[Oh boy is this not something Envy was expecting to hear either. His back straightens; this is something he's always felt very strongly about, even if it used to manifest more in the form of vengeful rage.]

You don't have to feel guilty for that.

[Those words come out abruptly, almost automatic, and he pauses, trying to work out what to say. But his words still have an intensity behind them when he does continue.]

Bringing you back...that was his choice and he never thought to give you one. Just because he made you doesn't mean you should have to be what he wanted. We're not their dolls. We're people.

[a_sin_for_him]

I know that. I don't feel as though I owe him those things.

[Envy's vehemence is surprising.]

But the fact remains that I was a person who loved him, and who he loved. So much so that I still exist. And that's all I know about him. Just that he loved me so very much.

I don't think I would feel this way, if he hadn't been Scar's brother. That...was always there. Even at the best times, the awareness was...always there. It's not my guilt alone I'm bearing.

[It isn't as though she doesn't know. They had only ever talked on it briefly, once or twice. They couldn't talk about it, without more pain. No matter what they had found together, no matter how much he had loved her, there was always that part of him that believed fully it would have been best if she didn't exist at all.]